Pooped

What a weekend! First, all the crazy snow comes in and I'm climbing through all of it every day just to find a nice place to take a crap. Then, Mommy and Daddy take me to the photography studio Saturday afternoon to take a family portrait for Xmas (yes, I say Xmas. So what? Jesus, don't be hatin' on me now. I'm just lazy, that's all.) and of course, I have to spend several minutes perusing the joint first and checking out all the various smells before I can settle down and get to the business at hand. I got in trouble as we were setting up the shoot because I slyly walked over to the fake fireplace while they weren't looking and snatched a gumdrop off of the little gingerbread house. Unfortunately, they're a little stickier than I thought so I couldn't surreptitiously wolf it down. Then, the idiots think they can put me in a gift-wrapped box and I'll just stand in there prettily while they pose for the camera. Please! I'm a pasha, not a sideshow! I finally agreed to pose for a few pics with them as they were begging me to and I was feeling sorry for them. What can I say? I threw them a few crumbs and they gobbled it up gratefully.

Later that evening, they had a Xmas party and as usual, I was the center of attention. Man, I made that party! If it wasn't for me, you would have probably seen a bunch of people sitting around the table staring at each other with nothing but the sounds of mosquitoes in the background and an occasional throat-clearing. I got a lot of wonderful pets out of the evening and many offers to take me home but I don't think I'm gonna go anywhere. I'm quite happy where I am now, even if I have to throw the poor humans a bone from time to time. A pasha's work is never done.