Thar She Blows

We've gotten so much snow over the past two weeks. I feel like I'm climbing Mount Everest every time I go outside to lift my leg. But now, it's been raining for like two days. The streets are flooding from the rain and the melting snow and when I go out in the yard, I sink into the snow if I stand still for too long. So maybe that's the reason that Mommy and Daddy got me this ridiculous outfit. Look at me. I'm the Gorton's Fisherman. And I don't even get to eat any of the fish sticks. And am I supposed to be able to pee in this thing? I'm not so sure. But I'm sure they had my best interests in mind when they bought me this getup. I'm sure it had nothing to do with humiliating me once again and dressing me up like some sick, furry Ken doll. No, that couldn't be it. They would never do that. Never. Or would they?